" A defining factor of BPD is that we are plagued with no sense of self.
In between partners I would find myself completely lost and out of my depth. I did not know who I was until I had attached to someone else. My life had no purpose until I could fill it with someone who loved and cared for me.
When I was with partners, I struggled to understand them. I think I can speak for a lot of people with BPD when I say that we simply just don’t understand other people. We don’t understand their motives or just plain anything. "
Like wtf.
How is this even possible? Dayum man. I've known some folks who date shit tons and can't be alone ever, but if this is what drives them then that's so fucked up. It always struck me as odd that people aren't okay in their own company, and I know loads of people get married or dare because they can't be alone but that can't be because they all have BPD. So there must be a spectrum that people exist on.
Wow. And I can't even imagine what having no sense of self is like. Or to change personality based on people around you. What the fuck. It's bad enough on its own but to feel compelled to do it? Bruh.
Okay I'm genuinely mind blown at this. I don't think I've ever met someone like this to be honest. And it even said their mood swings to extremes within minutes. That's so unstable.
What the fuck was M thinking if he ever was with someone like this? Duuuuude. Oh my god. Fuck I don't even know what to say.
I thought that bong dude I knew was erratic but no, I have zero experience even knowing someone this way. Why the fuck did M stick around someone like this?! Didn't it strike him as extremely unreal? Like these mood shifts etc alone seem like they'll be hell to live with. And you'd be constantly on edge around that person because you don't want them to fly off the handle or do something horrible. Fuck.
Brooooo. I used to think dealing with people like A was hell but no, she was definitely nasty asf but nowhere close to this shit. She once blocked me for 3 months cuz I sent her some Ed Sheeran song lyrics and she took offence to them for some reason and then unblocked me near her birthday and then yelled at me for not wishing her. 💀💀 Wasn't even the worst thing she did to me but my god, it was pure hell knowing her. Imagine dating someone who behaves like this. Now I'm just sorry for her husband. But I get why she picked him too, his whole identity is fawning over her to a point where it's very gross to see. Like why can't he have some sense of himself or some purpose and I used to wonder why tf she picked that guy of all people. But I guess people like this can't be with someone equal or stronger than them, cuz they can't be controlled. 💀
Wow. Okay I think I understand better why he seems to hate conflict too. It must just make him on edge and feel powerless also if he feels like he is compelled to behave a certain way. I know how much I hated it when I had to feel like I was under A's thumb and had to cater to her needs or she would get nasty. That's a horrid feeling. Even K hated it and never married her because of the trauma she inflicted on him. And she is horrible but not this bad.
Mofo.
This guy should have just told me earlier about this, I'd have understood him better then. Poor thing. A lot of his behaviour makes sense to me, in this context. Or why he is so keen on keeping his friend away from that other crazy lady. Must have first hand knowledge of what this is like.
Plus I've hated that feeling of powerlessness where you cater to someone at the cost of your own self. So I know the fear and unsettling feeling it leaves you with constantly.
Ugh.
Aaaaa why would you stay with a person like this you dodo! I mean I guess I get it, I've also been in a similar situation and didn't leave for ages thinking the other person will change. Man, what a shitshow.
These articles make me grateful I booted A to be honest. A good reminder.🎗️
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