Reading a lot after a long time. In the middle of war and peace and it's making me think. Esp this dialogue

~ My wife," continued Prince Andrew, "is an excellent woman, one of those rare women with whom a man's honor is safe; but, O God, what would I not give now to be unmarried! You are the first and only one to whom I mention this, because I like you." ~

He says this to his friend, while he plans on abandoning his preggers wife at his country house as he goes to war because he is bored. A wife described as charming and beautiful and someone who basically catches every eye in the room. 

This complete neglect and offhand behaviour is literally the stuff of nightmares. Even after she breaks down in front of his friend and point blank asks. A pregnant woman, pleading to know why her husband suddenly seems to have changed? And he is just aloof. 

I would hate a person like this from the bottom of my heart after I was done feeling hurt from the coldness. And the worst part of this is his awareness that his honor is safe with her, which basically means she is just a prisoner in that horrid state. Won't cheat, won't know why things went wrong, most likely blame herself for it or at the very least find herself inadequate. I never want to relate to such a character again. And I never want to see Andrew as a person who is anything other than the cunt he is. This is abhorrent to me.  And I honestly wonder. If someone treats a person this way for long periods, is it not just emotional abuse? And if they are indifferent to this extent, then do you really owe them any loyalty? That whole nagging wife stereotypes that boomers laugh at, it all stems from placing the women in situations like these, cutting off their legs, their freedom, giving them morsels then being fed up when they complain because why not? God, I truly hate the lot. 

Don't ever love someone who doesn't love you back. As a friend, a lover, partner, whatever the equation. Love and loyalty are a contract between two people, bound by mutual respect. There is no respect here in Lise and Andrews marriage, so who is beholden to whom and why? Balance is important, but so is consideration. 

I do also get Andrews pov though, and his hate for the limp, frivolous conversations high society, the banality of such an existence, especially for someone who is well read, clever, informed and would consequently just loathe being stuck with people whose intellect he cannot respect. That itself is enough to want to run away, and avoid a wife that you associated with that group. Personally, I've always hated those circles where it's only displays of materialism but zero substance otherwise. But I can't deny that it is selfish in the extreme to feel this way without considering the impact of your indifference on your partner. 

Anyways, let's see how this situation pans out. 

Fucking just triggered me straight up lol. And I haven't even gotten to the bits that are about war or peace. FML