Spied the word Bengali on a yt vid and Google pics decided to regurgitate some old pics of my Bengali ex in the same day. Lol, what a coincidence. Of all the weird people I dated in my 'experience' phase, this one really takes the cake. Idk what is it about them culturally, but that weird cheating fixation is the one thing that made me steer clear of them henceforth. Man, all the banned stuff he wanted me to do, the insistence on keeping me insecure, the late night yellings. Tried to have a threesome with me and my friend and made me feel like I'm not adventurous enough when I wasn't giving into the idea. And then wanted an open relationship with someone as possessive as me. Darling, did you not know who I was or did you simply assume I'm susceptible to manipulations? Crazy. Glad I was a black and white person who simply didn't give into all the invitations to losing my mind lol. The amount of poetry he wrote me, and all of it ended with him wanting to hate fuck me. Interestingly, I'd met a similar dude sometime early last year, and he tried to ask me out. Also a poet, also into banned ass poetry. Skipped out on him like my house was on fire. People like these have just ruined my trust in people, come to think of it. I wonder when was the last time I even felt a sense of trust, ease and camaraderie with anyone? Been years. I guess that's why I'm so guarded now and refuse to allow anyone into my heart. But it's okay I suppose, the barriers serve a purpose. Right kinda folks will win your trust easily, just gotta wait it out.
Young P - sometimes I really wonder tf were you thinking? Lmao.
You live, you learn. 🤷♀️
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