Hope and Innocence

Hehe, I found this. So much like my childhood. I was constantly cooking up some random schemes and making people follow me. Like building a spaceship from scratch. From scratch, mind you. With the belief that it would be done in two weeks max. A total corporate hoe deadline. It even has dragonflies. When dad was in Rajasthan, there were a lot of dragonflies there. Some kids used to make it a game to tie a string around their tails and make them fly. I hated those kids. It was abominable to me that someone would be cruel enough to take away that fly's freedom. 

Oh and and that time I made purnima join me in rescuing the two puppies from school. Which in retrospect, might have been us just flicking two puppies 💀. Wait, was it? Crap. Why is this only occuring to me today? Oh no. 

And we had to walk all the way back instead of taking the schoolbus. And then people thought she was kidnapped cuz she didn't reach home until very late. Man, I didn't hear the end of it when both sets of parents found out I was at the bottom of it all. What an F.

This pic made me reread some of my diaries that I kept from the age of 7? Maybe.The first one contains my first attempt at writing a book. And it was basically me just writing the plot of some Enid Blyton I had read. Lol. The rest of it is just decoding song lyrics and writing poetry. One thing that stood out in those entries and even entries of my teens was how utterly innocent I was. I always had this self image of someone very crude, and the world just tells you that you aren't feminine when you are assertive. I ended up believing that and assuming I'm an outsider for idk...most of my life? But as I read these entries I just feel like... Hmm. Like I'm someone who I would have chosen to protect had I seen the vulnerabilities in me. I just learnt early on to hide them well, to a point where noone can sense them even now unless I show it. But yeah, I was actually quite a sweet, sensitive, innocent soul. It's taken me so many years to realise that. Maybe I still am like that, who knows? I'll read this a decade from now and go 'awww'. Hehe.