Crazy amount of exhaustion... I'm looking forward to going back home. Just need my own space heh. 

I saw this guy playing and he did what I asked also and it was nice I guess. Will say that to him atleast. Don't want to tell him my granny passed. I don't think he would care. I don't think another one of those ' hope it gets better soon ' kinda automated responses will be tolerable to me. 

Hmm. Oh well it's okay. Can't make a person care so why out them in a spot where they need to pretend to? Chuck it. 

Heh. Sooo much has happened in these two days. Mom telling me she is glad I'm around. I suppose in some ways I've become a bit of a rock for them. Uncle telling me I don't talk much. I guess maybe I don't. But mostly when I don't know what to say heh. Well. 

It's good to get perspective on things tbh. It's nice. Don't know if it lasts or anything but atleast once in a while it's good to get out of your own environment. 

I see my aunt doing a lot for uncle who was unwell. He seems all antsy at times. Men who feel like they aren't useful tend to become babies that need attention and respect. It can get annoying and yet I see her do a lot for him. I guess that's love in some sense. Heh. I think a loooot of women do this. Baby men cuz they love them. And as much as I had thought it was crazy as a kid I kiiinda now get it. Cuz I'm also like this no. I will in the end cater to random whims when I understand a person is dependent on me etc. Just... I guess yeah that's just a form of love. You want the best for them. 

My other cousin also visited. Getting married in December and moving to the US. Her bro meeting mine in jersey. It's crazy how literally everyone I know ends up there. But it's good they have each other. I'm glad. She was quite sad about moving, cuz she is suuuch a family person. But I hope she is happy too. Hehe. Such a smarty pants too. Most people I know are clever and so accomplished and I low key love that. Even though chartered accountancy seems so fucking boring but hey, she is one of the best in the country so hell yeah. Good stuff. 

Well. All in all a huge reunion and lots to digest.